Hello all,

Let me start by saying that I am a new member, and I have found this forum extremely informative. I have been looking through the threads, and I haven't found one on this topic so I thought I would ask for some advice.

Here is the problem. My boyfriend and I got two huskies puppies together last August. They are absolutely great dogs and I love them both very much. It breaks my heart to say this, but my boyfriend and I might have to go out separate ways.. It's not final yet but it looks like out relationship is going to end. We have decided its fair for me to take the girl dog (Layla) and he keeps the boy (Nico). They have been together since they were born, and they have a never been apart, ever. I'm concerned that they are going to suffer from being apart... I guess I'm asking if anyone has gone through this before, and how did they help their dogs get past it? They are a year and a few months old, and have been together since they were born.

If you really need to separate the dogs.. You might want to consider fostering or adopting another dog (husky) It would help with the separation I would think.

Okay, great! Thank you for the reply. If I do have to separate them I would be moving back home, and my dad has three family dogs she would be aroun all the time. Granted they are far from huskys.... But do you think that would help distract her? Also we would still be doing our daily runs/bike rides

My husky puppy loves my lab and shepherd mix. If similar size and energy, I think it will help out a lot to have other dogs around. I would be more careful if your dad only has really small docile lap type dogs.

My lab and shepherd mix had been together since my lab was 8 months or so. Last year, we tried seperating them for a few weeks - a week at a time. They did pretty good. These are dogs that have been together for 11 years and I wanted to see what would happen if they were seperated. Just some more tender loving care and attention is needed.

You may want to look up littermate syndrome too to make sure your puppies are not suffering from that as they were purchased at same time. I'm not sure what happens when you seperate puppies with littermate syndrome. Offhand, I think it is what is recommended.

Thank you for sharing that information! Unfortunantly, the dogs at my dads house are the "lap dog" type.. So she might get some play time with them if they are up for it. She's on the smaller side for huskys, about 45lbs, so I'm not too worried about her playing to rough with them. I figured they would give her some companionship if anything. I'm so worried she in going to be so lonely without her partner in crime...

I do take comfort from hearing that when you separated your dogs after 11 years, they weren't completely heartbroken. I did look into th litter mate syndrome, and there is alot of good info there. We did get both pups at the same time. However, I haven't seen any of the behavior associated with the syndrome. I plan on giving her alot of love and attention. It's just a heart breaking thought that because my partner and I couldn't work it, out yet have to suffer..

Yeah I often think about this a lot as I have two dogs with my boyfriend. My huskies are 6 months apart but if it came down to it they would most likely have to be separated if we split. I have always known that I would take Siku whether he liked it or not and I would give him a chance to have Nikolai with the option if it got to be to much for him, I would buy Nikolai from him so he would never be given up and have a good life with me. Make sure your boyfriend knows that you want the dog if he can't handle him in the end by himself. Keep your schedule the same as much as you can with your girl and that will help ease some of the stress from not being with her brother. Does he take good care of the husky when you were not there? Is he very involved? If not maybe you could throw a number out there and see if he would give you him? Just make sure in the transition you give her lots of attention, and either do a dog park or maybe even daycare so she is still socializing with dogs her size and play level! I hope this helps and that everything ends up well for you and your girl!

I would also suggest doggie daycare if you have one nearby. My pup is an only dog and was pretty lacking in the social skills department, he would always fixate on any dog in the dog park and relentlessly try and play (typical husky play with lots of teeth and overly aggressive). He was with his littermates until 9 weeks and still was awful with other dogs. He would end up getting attacked almost every time we went for a while. I sent him to daycare 2-3 days a week for about 2 months and I'm happy to say now that we can go to the dog park without him causing major issues now. There are a few dogs in the hood that just don't like him (there owners mentioned that their dogs didn't like huskies), especially since he's maturing sexually and is not fixed yet, but overall, he does pretty well, and he has learned when to back off or leave a dog alone.

Anyway, it would probably be really helpful for a separation issue like this because it will allow your dog to make new friends in a safe environment. It will also help her burn energy so that when she comes home she won't try to play too rough with the lap dogs. When Dizzy goes, it totally wears him out for about 2 days. He comes home and passes out. I have to wake him up to go out! It has helped Dizzy out immensely with small dogs as well. There was a 12 week old husky puppy at the park yesterday and he was a little rough with him, but I stepped in and gave the puppy a break when he got overwhelmed. So yeah, sorry to go on and on about my pup, but I just wanted to give you an example about how it has helped him out.

I'm sorry you have to separate from your boyfriend, and separate the two dogs, but it sounds like things will work out. Also, I'm sorry if I missed it, but I would highly recommend crate training if you haven't. It will be a place for her to feel safe when you're away for work or school and will keep the little dogs safe as well. I'm sure with lots of love and attention she'll be okay. Keep in mind she'll probably miss your boyfriend as well. Even though Dizzy is 'my' dog, he absolutely adores my hubby. Pat travels a lot for work and when he's gone Dizzy kinda looks for him, and when he gets back he is SO SO happy to see him. If your split is friendly, you could always have play dates for the pups or have Nico come stay with you or Layla go stay with your ex on the weekends.

I don't know of a doggie day care in this area, but I know of some back home in va. That's a great suggestion that I never really thought of before. Oh don't be sorry at all! I could go on and on about my pups, I love hearing how that helped correct your pups behavior:) and I think it's a great option to give Layla a chance to socialize and make new friends in order to ease the separation from Nico.

You mentioned that your pup is an only dog, do you think he does well durning the day when he is alone? And he gets enough interaction to make him happy witb visits to the dog park often? I didn't mention that both dogs are crate trained. However, I haven't been using their crates often recently since I have been home all the time. And whenever they have been crated, the crates were right next to eachother, so they weren't really "alone". During the crate training process I tried to make it as enjoyable as it can be for both of them. Their quiet place to rest sorta thing. Layla has done well in the crate, however, it seems to make Nico anxious from time to time. But that's just possibly because I haven't put them in their crates often enough lately. I love the idea of going to the dog park to have her play, and burn off that typical husky energy! In my experience a well exercised/tried husky makes for a relaxed and happy husky! Lol

Thank you for the apologizes. It's always hard when a relationship ends... But now there's the added heartache of losing a dog in the process... I think they are both still very young, and hopefully will both be able to bounce back if worse comes to worse and we call it quiets.. I take great comfort from talking to everyone on the forum. As I said in the beginning this as been my first post, and I have gotten wonderful advice and responses form you guys! I so greatful, and I take comfort knowing there is this whole community that I can rely in situations like this. Thank you everyone so much! This has really helped ease my mind a bit about the pups

Well, my hubby works from home when he's not traveling, so he's not really alone often, but he is confined to his 'room' (an alcove separated by baby gates, or his crate). I do feel like it takes a lot more effort to keep his needs fulfilled (we also live in a small apartment), I take him for at least a 30-45 min walk before work, then when I get home, it's pretty much all about him, walk, dog park, etc. That said, he's a puppy, and I expect as he gets older and his needs change, he'll require different things to keep him happy. But, yes, I do feel like he gets enough interaction to be happy. We live in a very dog friendly neighborhood, and can't go outside without seeing other dogs. I can tell when he hasn't gotten enough, so I amp it up, or send him to daycare for a day. On Saturday, we had to leave him home alone for about 8 hours and he did great. That's the longest he's been alone without someone coming to check on him and walk him. I setup a webcam to keep an eye on him and he played with his toys, chewed his bone, and slept. No crying or whining thankfully and I made sure to take him to the dog park that morning and spend some time with him.

cait.taft wrote:

You mentioned that your pup is an only dog, do you think he does well durning the day when he is alone? And he gets enough interaction to make him happy witb visits to the dog park often? I didn't mention that both dogs are crate trained. However, I haven't been using their crates often recently since I have been home all the time. And whenever they have been crated, the crates were right next to eachother, so they weren't really "alone". During the crate training process I tried to make it as enjoyable as it can be for both of them. Their quiet place to rest sorta thing. Layla has done well in the crate, however, it seems to make Nico anxious from time to time. But that's just possibly because I haven't put them in their crates often enough lately. I love the idea of going to the dog park to have her play, and burn off that typical husky energy! In my experience a well exercised/tried husky makes for a relaxed and happy husky! Lol

Where you haven't called it quits yet, separate their crates when you are leaving them in different rooms, so she can be used to not having him near her if that happens. It might help by the time that you get to the other place that you are staying.

Suki&Nikolai; Okay, that's a great suggustion! I wrote a long response to your post, but it doesn't look like it popped up. In responce to what you said earlier, I have assumed the main responsibilities of caring for the dogs. Nick (boyfriend) will walk Nico in the morning, but that's about it. He wants to keep Nico simply for the principle of it, he claims he doesn't think it's possible to love an animal. So I know he doesn't feel like I do about the dog. In my opinion, it's just out of spite he would keep him. I have made it very clear that if he changes his mind I would gladly pay him for Nico. So at least that's out there..

Wpskier222: That is absolutely wonderful to hear! I never really had to think about making sure they get interaction/play time with other dogs because they get so much of tht with eachother. But knowing that she can be just has happy and relaxed makes me feel so much better. I'm assuming there will be a transition time where she might feel kinda crappy, but you bet I'm gonna be keeping her very busy! I think it would be a great idea to set up a webcam like you have to see if she is relaxed when she is crated. And since I plan on crating them in separate rooms I would be interested to see how both pups react.

Ok i dont know if you wanna go this route, if its gonna be a ugly break up or not, but it seems like he doesnt like the dogs as much. Who actually payed for he dogs, who payed for vet bills, who pays for food? If you have done most, and have recipts still, i think the dogs both would be yours. You would have to look at papers and stuff when you got them and see what name the dogs are under and stuff but if you want to maybe try that route i would talk to a lawyer and maybe do a little research on the internet. Again i dont know if you guys are trying to stay civil or not.

There's no question about it in my mind, I don't think he cares for the dogs nearly as much a I do. I don't think he's capable of loving an animal. That is something he has told me. So with that being said, he did pay for the purchase of both dogs. But since then I have paid for all vet bills, the dog food, and frontline, the collars and leashes, etc. I have all the vet records that are under my name alone. and he has the actual recipt from the breeder. It's only a piece of paper saying they sold us a male and female siberian husky, and it states their color. That's it. When we got into a fight about a month ago, I called the sheriffs department and asked what would happen if I left and took both dogs. And then said pretty much, if he has a recipt saying he paid for them it would be a civil court case. And that the dogs would be viewed as children according to the law. I would prefer it to stay civil, however if I thought I would win the case for sure I would do it if we break it off. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to actually talk to a lawyer rather than the sheriffs department since it sounded like the guy I talked to was just guessing would could happen

I think it would be a long shot then since he has the records from the breeder and he payed for them. But idk. Didnu offer to pay for them? If so what did he say?

Yes, I think a lawyer would be more helpful. Actually, in most states, dogs are treated as property, not as children. I think it would be a toss up of who would win the civil case, and it would probably be a game of chicken in the end... Honestly, if I were in your position. I would just take them both, possession is 9/10's of the law anyway right? Take them, and leave a check made out to his name for the original cost of the dogs with 'purchase of nico and layla' written in the memo section. If he signs cashes the check, then you have fulfilled the original purchase price and aside from the receipt, he has no proof that they are 'his.' By leaving him the check, you have essentially made that a wash, and you have the vet records to back that up. Most of the time in property dispute cases they will just demand the one who kept the property pay the other partner. Also, who's name is he registered under in the city you live in? When I got Dizzy's rabies vaccine, I had to register him with the city under my name. Are they microchipped? Is that in your name? If they are registered to you they are yours. You could argue that they were a gift.

It's totally up to you, but I think there is a lot of legal grey area to work with here, and you have as much proof they belong to you as he does in terms of the vet records. I'd just take them and leave the check and hope he cashed it, but obviously I don't know your bf and how stubborn he is, either way, I think you have a pretty good case.

Where in Virginia are you located (or going to be located)? I live in northern Virginia and there are a lot of great doggie day cares that have helped socialize our pup.

I think you are absolutely right. There is just as much proof they belong to me. I think in the end if I did like a check like you said he would cash it and that would be that. I would be very surprised if he decided to try and come after me. That's a very valade choice, and something I am willing to mod if push comes to shove. There really isn't a good reason for me to let him keep Nico. It sucks I didn't think about this when we got the dogs, but it would have been so easy to tell the breeder to put my name on the recipt as well. He is pretty stubborn; but he has alot of other things with work going on right now, I seriously doubt he would get into a lengthy legal disput.

I will contact a lawyer and get their professional opinion about the about the case. Then if things continue the way they are going now, I will be writing him a check soon, and packing up.

And I am from northern Virginia, around the brambleton area if you are familiar with that. I would love some recommendations!

cait.taft wrote:

I think you are absolutely right. There is just as much proof they belong to me. I think in the end if I did like a check like you said he would cash it and that would be that. I would be very surprised if he decided to try and come after me. That's a very valade choice, and something I am willing to mod if push comes to shove. There really isn't a good reason for me to let him keep Nico. It sucks I didn't think about this when we got the dogs, but it would have been so easy to tell the breeder to put my name on the recipt as well. He is pretty stubborn; but he has alot of other things with work going on right now, I seriously doubt he would get into a lengthy legal disput.

I will contact a lawyer and get their professional opinion about the about the case. Then if things continue the way they are going now, I will be writing him a check soon, and packing up.

And I am from northern Virginia, around the brambleton area if you are familiar with that. I would love some recommendations!

I live in Reston, so not too far from Brambleton. There are a lot of great options for doggie daycare, from the least expensive (Petsmart) to very expensive (Old Towne Pet Resort). We bring Kai to Dogtopia, which falls in the middle of the two. There are multiple locations in the area (Herndon, Tyson's, Dulles), but we've only had experience with the Tyson's location thus far because it's on the way to work. We have been very impressed with the staff and how much Kai loves it. There are a few other pups around her age, so she has just gone crazy with them and is excited when we get to the parking lot!

Let me know if you have any questions about Dogtopia. Like I said, there are many more options as well. If you're up for it in the future, we should get our huskies together for play dates, I'm always looking for more huskies Kai that can meet. She loves all breeds, but every time we've met another husky, she gets even more excited.

And just to come back to the original topic, I'm sorry that you all have to go through this. It can't be easy, especially when you have dogs together. Like many have said, if you do choose the route where you get one and he gets the other, I'm sure they will be sad, but increased affection/playtime with other dogs would help a lot.

My boyfriend and I had broken up for about 6 months almost 2 years ago now. We only had the two dogs, I took Embry and he took Zoey. Embry was perfectly fine without another dog, given he was an only dog for over a year. Zoey on the other hand missed him like crazy, she had always had other dogs around her. We still lived nearby and worked together, and I found out he was neving her in her kennel for almost 16-17 hours a day. One day I drove by the place and saw her tied up outside, and he was in the shower so I just took her. He thought she ran away and called me crying because he knew I would flip on him...I told him that I knew he wasn't capable of taking care of her, and he wasn't getting her back. He was pissed but I know I did the right thing. We got back together though and got another dog, but if we ever broke up again I think I've made it pretty clear that they're all mine..

Yes talk to a lawyer, I have often considered that route too. I keep a book of every expense when it comes to the dogs, and although this may be sneaky (but they mean everything to me), I have made it so he has absolutely no proof when it comes to the dogs about who paid what. Vet, daycare, registration, one of the dog receipts and AKC are all in my name. If that is the case for you, I would move out one day, take both dogs, and leave the check for a fair amount. If he cashes it, then its done, if he does not and claims he wants the dog then threaten him with legal action and that will most likely scare him off. If not, the worse that can happen is you lose the case, but at least you tried to obtain him. If you are going to do legal action, see if your state does lean more towards the best interest of the animal than rather "property" because you will have a better chance. I know here in Maine, they consider the well being I've heard and it doesn't necessarily matter of the original owner on the sale bill.

It may get ugly, but in the end the well being of the dogs is what is going to matter and where it sounds like you have been the main caretaker, both should be with you if you can afford it.

If you share the dogs, is there other things he would like that you could trade? Maybe living room or bedroom furniture set? Something substantial to you that you would give up that was shared between you two? Maybe even something you bought. Just a option before taking it to lawyers and spending a bunch of both of your money. Whatever decision you make, I would write it up and have it notorized by a notary public at a bank. This of course assumes your dad is fine if you bring both dogs with you.

When my ex and I split he wanted to take one of the dogs, there was no way that was gonn fly. I took care of both of them (only had 2 at the time) and he was not at all responsible for them. 6 months after he had left it was abundantly clear that keeping both was the best decision for the dogs based on his actions. Never would I ever give any boyfriend/husband whoever one of the dogs.

I know it's awful but I signed the breeder contract in my name only. If anything happens this dog is mine. Not too much I can do about the kiddos but he's not gonna get the dog too!

Looking back I wish I kept the breeder recipt... If I had done that I wouldn't have to even consider giving up one of my dogs. And now the papers are locked up in his safe.. If I ever have the chance you bet in gonna take it. But looking back I wish I had documented the expenses like you have. You won't even have to worry about it.

I'm not sure if I mentioned this, but part of the reason he wants to keep Nico is because in his past two relationships he got dogs as well. And when they both ended, the ex girlfriend took the dogs just out of spite. So at this point he wants to keep him just based on the principle of buying 6 dogs in whole live, he wants to keep one. All the more reason for me to keep him because I actually love him.

Such a mess. I'm def contacting a lawyer tho