Has anyone ever had buyers remorse for a dog they adopted? I am having serious buyers remorse for the Malamute we just adopted. Although Kodiak and Glacier get along alright, they have had some fights and our little guy is scared of him and he seems like he wants to get her. Also the breeder I bought him from was th ebackyard type. i didn't realise that untill I went to pick up the dog. It was a 5 hour drive and when I got there, dispite the misgivings I had when I saw the place, I still bought the dog. Now I am having serious buyers remorse over all of it to the point oflosing sleep. I hate being like this and never felt like this about getting a dog. My wife says it is up to me but I decide to get rid of him, to do it real soon. The breeder is too far away to return him so I am either looking at craiglist or a rescue if I decide. I don't know what to do.

Adding a dog into a already established house hold is never easy, for that reason alone jumping in head first is never a great idea. Sometimes you get lucky, but for the most part these types of scenarios need to be fleshed out and thought out extremely well before you make that plunge.


I personally don't believe it's fair to the pup... but those are my opinions and mine alone. No guilt, No judging.


I do agree however that there is something to be said about keeping the balance already established in a household and if something is throwing off that balance then it isn't fair to everyone else there. If fear is truly a problem between the two, and it can't be worked on then it might be best in the end to rehome or return the pup.

I live with an animal that drives me INSANE... but we keep her and work everyday to fix her.

I will however say this: Rehoming is a very stressful time for dogs they often do not show their true nature or character until a couple of months down the road. It might be something you can work on. Ripley is NOT the same dog today as she was when we got her.

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It was a 5 hour drive and when I got there, dispite the misgivings I had when I saw the place, I still bought the dog.

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The breeder is too far away to return him...

I'm confused... You drove the 5 hours to pick up the pup, but now that there is an issue it is too far of a trip to return the pup?

Seems unfair to the pup to me. Though I'm not an advocate of Back yard breeding if the breeder is willing to take the pup back it could be one of the better places for him.

Rescues are packed to the brim for the most part and at least back where he was he would have other dogs to play with or be around, at least to me anyways.


Like anything this is your choice in the end. No one else knows what is best for your situation other than you.

Best of luck,
~Chris~

I would so take him!!

I did when I got Willow. Shoot, lots of people do, thats why you see so many in shelters. I never had so much trouble with a puppy as I did with her but it just wasn't an option for me to get rid of her. That's just how I felt and I understand its not right for everyone. After long months, and I mean many months, tons of training and just staying a step ahead, I adore her now. She is two and so, so much better. I still have training issues with her but my love for her is very strong. Plus, those issues are my faults, not hers. There is still a lot I need to learn to be a better dog trainer. That's a huge reason why I stay on this forum. It really comes down to how much work you want to put into him. There are some puppies out there that are ALOT more work than others and I feel that the extra work really does make you appreciate them more when you get to where you want to be with them in their training. The question is, do you have the time and means to put that work into him?

Every dog takes some time to adjust to a new environment. Our pup was completely different in the beginning to what she is now, and we've only had her since the end of August. It took her about 3 weeks just to get used to the house and the environment. Have patience.

How long have you had him?

Also, the best thing you can do is get him checked out by the vet. Dogs are often carrying parasites or worms which can make them behave differently.

Your dogs are also going to have to work out between them who is going to be the Alpha. This could take some time until they get it sorted between themselves.

Another thing you can do is walk them all as a pack. Get them all out in the street and take them for a nice walk. They get to learn to co-operate with each other when they're on the leash with you.

Melissa should chime in on this one! Her Mya does not like new dogs or puppies coming home. They worked through a lot to bring in Kody and Asia. So it can be done, but do you have the patience and time for it?

Tika, I really do not wish to return him because of the conditions he was living in. I do not wish to put him back into that.

Mindy, I have the time, I am just very worried about how he reacts to my little one. I am so afraid he will harm her.

Kaya, i have only had him for a few days and I do know it takes time. when we got Kodiak, our little one was scared but he never tried to attack her, he mostly ignored her.

It's normal to feel frustrated and unsure if this is the "right thing," it happens more times than you think. Especially when it doesn't go as smoothly as one would like.

How old is the puppy/dog? And how long have you had them? If i'm having issues like this with a new dog- puppy or not- I do not place them with my group unless I am there and it isn't a "high anxiety time" such as feeding, or getting ready for a walk. This is a usual time for an outburst.

I would crate the dog when I am not physically there to monitor where I can commit to working with them. If the dog is being rough or pushy with one of my dogs- they are put away in time out immediately. I do not tolerate new dogs trying to bully resident dogs. All toys and bones are removed and they are basically the lowest rung of the ladder. No extra attention or spoilage is given- unless they have clearly earned it.

Having a home full of 6 dogs plus fosters in and out these methods have proved themselves to me.

Well, I'll admit I have adopters remorse over the third dog we added to our pack. I loved our third dog initially but as time wore on so did she on me. It's such a terrible thing to say but adopting Glory is the only thing I really regret doing in my entire life. If I could go back in time and change ANYTHING about my past decisions, adopting Glory is the only thing I would change. But she's with us and we're stuck with her for life, despite the way I feel about it. I just share this because I do have adopters remorse and it's not because she doesn't fit in or because she's new to the pack or anything.

I would definitely give your new addition more time, I wouldn't make a decision until several months in just to be sure assuming all pack members are safe and co-existing well enough and no one is in danger of being seriously harmed. I had adopters remorse when we adopted our sibe, he was my first husky (and first dog of my own) and was hell on 4 paws. I was ready to take him back to the shelter within 3 weeks of adopting him and hubby asked me to stick it out a while longer. I did and he's turned into the best thing I could have hoped for.

Thanks valerie, I am just very worried and probably over protective of our little one. She is a 18 month old shih tzu mix.

I did when we adopted Kay. Her and Maya would get into fights everyday, at least 2 or 3. I was okay with it for the first month, i just waited for things to calm down. Then Maya became really grouchy and would growl and snap at people when they cuddle/lay on her. She's always grumbled when someone lays on her but not snap, unless its my brother. Maya got really moody and pissy at Kay and Sophie and everyone else but me. So i thought it would be better for us to re home Kay since Maya wasn't happy. But it wouldn't be fair to Kay, she had finally found a home and i couldn't just throw her away. I had decided that if things didn't get better and if Maya just got more and more grouchy in a couple months we'd give her to a friend. I also started to take Maya on walks alone so she can get some alone time away from the pups.

We've had her for about 2 and a half months now and things are a lot better. Kay hadn't been socialized well with other dogs before we got her so she's very rude and annoying with Maya and Sophie. She's learned to be a little less annoying and give them some space. Maya has also become a little more patient with her, they even cuddle sometimes. Kay will paw at Maya when she wants attention so now Maya will paw at Kay when she wants some. Although Kay still pisses Maya off when she barks at her non stop but they haven't gotten into any serious fights lately. Maya will just tell her off and jump away from Kay when she gets pissy. If Kay's play gets too much for Maya she'll just sit next to me or jump up on to the couch and join when she's ready.

Maya really doesn't like pushy dogs and Kay is a really pushy dog, so it took some time for them to get along.

I think everyone has probably had at least one moment, after brining a new dog home, when they questioned if they did the right thing.

Bringing another dog into a home is a stressful thing and it can take time for everything to settle in. And bringing a dog like a husky or malamute into the mix doesn't make it easier. I've had Pippa since August and while things are generally much better than they were at first, there are still days when I question my sanity, but I love her, so I keeping working with her and pray the next day is better.

I'm willing to bet that Glacier hasn't spent much time around smaller dogs, and that will take time and training. He's probably not trying to "attack" her as much as he is just trying to get her to play. While that's no excuse for him to play too rough, puppies don't inherently understand not to play certain ways with certain dogs. It's true what everyone says too about it taking a while sometimes for dogs to really come into their own in a new home. He's probably nervous and unsure still about where he is and why he's somewhere new.

I would wait, and continue to work with him. In a few months, if it appears he still isn't meshing well with the rest of the family, then I'd consider rehoming him. Just my opinion.

Ouch bringing back sad/bad memories.

When Mylo, passed away July 2010 the silence in the house was deafening even tho Adobo was here. I knew she missed her big brother, but now in all honesty I realize now I missed him just as much if not more. The Friday of Labor Day weekend I picked up another Malamute (named her Tinola) from the rescue and such a beautiful dog. Adobo acted a bit apprehensive but I just assumed shyness toward the newcomer. Tinola was in the house 15 minutes and the first of future battles started. Okay I take one of many deep breaths and figured I had my hands full in this one. Within hours Adobo was acting like she was walking on glass and nails and she felt safest under the dining room table. Long story short by Sunday morning my wife came into the family room and said it sounded like they were fighting. Thank God she heard it because I never would have with my hearing impairment. I rushed outside into the kennel and Tinola was on top of Adobo and I have no doubt she would have killed her if I hadn't intercepted. In just those few days I knew I couldn't keep her Adobo had seniority rights so to speak. I called the rescue they told me where to take her for evaluation, it didn't take a rocket scientist to realize what was going to happen. After this had happen I was finally told she had a record of violence.

Well over 2 years later this still rates as probably one of my biggest defeats in life.

Remember folks a Malamute can destroy a Husky if it wants to if cornered, the only saving grace a Husky would have is if it has a escape route.

With Beth and I, Tinola was a big old teddy bear but the danger she presented to other dogs just wasn't going to work out like I wanted. A few months later I came this --> <-- close to a nervous breakdown because of it, sometimes I wonder if I ever recovered. So when I say I'm a nut case yeah I am but I'm just smart enough realize it to.

Paul, you've got fire in your hands, no matter what you do you stand a big chance of being burned. I wish you the best.

SaraB wrote:

Melissa should chime in on this one! Her Mya does not like new dogs or puppies coming home. They worked through a lot to bring in Kody and Asia. So it can be done, but do you have the patience and time for it?

Yep, it was NOT easy or fun! The first few months were hard.. Not going to lie. In the end it's so worth it though! There are going to be spats. I wasn't used to this either and if it wasn't for this forum I think I would have lost it. I think it was harder with Kody since Mya had never had another dog in the house. Thankfully he's a very submissive dog and has always given into her for the most part. Fast forward to 8 months ago when we got Asia and I was about to call Kristina (arooroomom) and tell her that I just couldn't keep her. I literally went to sit in my car and cry It was HARD, but after a few months passed they go used to each other and everything has been OK. Asia also respects Mya to an extent so it works out.

It's not fair to the pup IMO. You should give him a chance. How long have you had him now? Not that long ,right?

As everyone said before, adding to a pack adds stress and it takes time for them to all learn about each other and things could calm down. There is a chance they won't though. It takes time and patience to let a pack rebuild after adding to it. When I had my three plus a foster GSD, things were great, but right after the GSD found a home, Mika did alot of rebellious activities for a while. When I brought Sophie home, it calmed back down again. Now Cali doesn't like any dog that enters her kingdom, she is the top diva and always be. She tolerates them though and that helps. She doesn't attack, just walks around and grumbles alot to see what reaction she gets. Sophie will grumble back at her and thats it. They haven't got into a fight or anything. I prefer my male though over all the females i have had. He doesn't care what happens as long as he is still able to cuddle with me cause thats all he does. The girls are pretty independent dogs unlike Steve.

Best of luck and I hope things go well for the pack, but at least you got the puppy away from a place that was unfavorable conditions.

kevo wrote:

As everyone said before, adding to a pack adds stress and it takes time for them to all learn about each other and things could calm down. There is a chance they won't though. It takes time and patience to let a pack rebuild after adding to it. When I had my three plus a foster GSD, things were great, but right after the GSD found a home, Mika did alot of rebellious activities for a while. When I brought Sophie home, it calmed back down again. Now Cali doesn't like any dog that enters her kingdom, she is the top diva and always be. She tolerates them though and that helps. She doesn't attack, just walks around and grumbles alot to see what reaction she gets. Sophie will grumble back at her and thats it. They haven't got into a fight or anything. I prefer my male though over all the females i have had. He doesn't care what happens as long as he is still able to cuddle with me cause thats all he does. The girls are pretty independent dogs unlike Steve.

Best of luck and I hope things go well for the pack, but at least you got the puppy away from a place that was unfavorable conditions.

Sounds like my house! Steve=Kody 100%! Same goes for the girls!

Definitely hang in there. Keep them separated when you're not there, and try the tethering method to keep an eye on him when you are there - keep a leash around your waist attached to him. Lets you watch him and also teaches him to respect you.

Our dogs fought for the first month or so, and now they're fine. Chili is still top dog and lets Frosti know it, but much less bloodshed. :)It went on longer because the little one challenged him so much, instead of submitting right away.

Definitely watch the Yorkie too - you may see some body language that could be setting Glacier off. Also make an effort to not carry the Yorkie around and put her on the floor at dog level. As Kristina said, we put away all toys and food. Maybe video tape them and post up for us to see what's going on! Good luck!

I had moments when we first got Danzig, where I felt it was a bad idea. We didn't have a stable living situation and it was hard for me to work with him, when I didn't live with him. But, we worked through it and spent as much time as possible working through the issues. Now, I'm so glad we stuck it out. Danzig is like my child and because we worked so much with him, I have a very strong bond with him.

I agree that you should use a crate until you are comfortable with leaving the dog without supervision.

Its seems everyone agrees with more time to actually see whats going on. If that doesnt help Id recommend either 2 things: professional help (in form of dog behaviorist or special pet guide/trainer, or looking for a good home for the dog. I understand how you feel, and many say its not fair to the dog, but noone can say its your fault either. We risk quite a bit bringing another dog into an established house and from there its just plain luck in a way. Hoping for the latter. I hope all goes well and you decide the best decision for you. Good luck

I literally cried more than I have in the past 10yrs, in the first month of owning Panzer. I would go in my room and break completely down after some of our first walks, and first off-leash experiences. In all the huskies, and other breeds I've trained, I had never dealt with a dog that was a fear-crazed and untame as Panzer. I couldn't bring myself to do anymore bad to her though, and so I'd just pick myself up, and try again the next day. Its not always easy in the beginning, but if it can be made to work, it is always 100% worth it. Just don't take unneccesary risks with your own safety or the safety of the dogs. It can be sad to not be able to help, but sometimes that's. The case.

Panzer is hardly trouble now, fyi.

^ Thats tough, glad to know it worked out in the end. Shiva has brought me to tears several times with her recklessness when she was younger and even made an ad to sell her. A week in I took it off (even after I got calls) and decided to stick through and Im glad I did, I really do. But that may not be the same for everyone.